I'm here. I'm alive. I'm riddled with blogging guilt… I blog for my own mental stimulation and amusement and I let is slide for entirely too long. I knew it was bad when my own mother scolded me for going 19 days straight without an entry. I always assume no one notices my absences, but then I get messages from my wonderful garden blogger friends who were nice enough to check up on me and make sure I hadn't dropped off the face of the Earth. (Thanks guys!)
The real reason for my 20-day lull in blogging is actually a lot less spectacular.
Remember how overgrown my garden looked in mid-summer?
Remember my plans to tie a rope around my waist and go into said garden and weed it back to something presentable and replant for the Fall?
Well I went in, but I forgot to tie the other end of the rope to something else and I got so deep in the garden that I couldn't find my way out. I spent the past 20 days lost in the deep overgrowth in my garden, clawing my way from raised bed to raised bed with the hopes of catching a glimpse of sunlight and a chance at finding my way out to civilization.
I had a glimmer of hope on Day 14 when I thought someone had spotted my signal fire, but was disappointed yet again when I realized that I hadn't actually built a signal fire, but was merely watching the "concert lighter" app on my iPhone.
It wasn't until I was spotted by a low-flying plane who saw my crude shelter by the bean trellis that a rescue attempt was started. By this point I had gone feral and was involved in a sordid affair with my garden gnome, Basil Boddywicket.
I've since showered, re-discovered clothes and mended bridges with Farmer B. However I'm still left with the problem of a dramatically overgrown garden that I'm too apprehensive to set foot in.
I have already proclaimed this weekend as the "reclaiming the garden" weekend at our house. Living in Florida I have developed a fear of large overgrown bushy grassy areas. I always equate them with poisonous snakes, biting bugs, spiderwebs and plants that adhere themselves to your legs causing itching, swelling and hives.
So although Farmer B doesn't know it yet, this weekend is his weekend to pull up the fence surrounding the garden, weedwack down the scary stuff that is higher than my children are tall, and put some ant killer down on the Antropolis that has claimed the back of the garden.
I will then daintily tiptoe in and weed the beds, rake, add some compost and try to kick this thing into gear again. Let's hope this time it all works out. It's actually written on our calendar, which is a huge step in the right direction. Maybe putting it out there to the world will also give me the motivation I need to follow through.
So, I'm as back as back gets right now... I'm crossing my fingers that it's for real this time...
Well, it's good to hear that all is fine. It sounds like farmer b is going to get a big surprise! heh.
ReplyDeleteMan, you really lost some weight while you were camping out in your garden. What happened to your boobs?
ReplyDeleteAll kidding aside, you should know by now that it's you we love, not your garden. OK, so it's really all about Clementine and Saffy, but you are their voice ;-)
Heee! I can see where the attraction came in, especially as you probably appreciated his dapper turn-out, complete with pointy cap. I mean, if you'd really gone feral, he probably looked like James Bond. Good of Farmer B to take you back. Begone, scary sliding and crawling things. Good luck -- it can get really overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteCouldn't you hitch a plow to Saffie?
Welcome back! Glad you made it out of the brush in one piece. I hope we have some cooler weather this weekend for your adventure. Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you are back, I was starting to worry too! I have the same fear of tall grasses! Note to self: get the concert lighter app on my iphone LOL!
ReplyDeleteDamn Garden Gnomes! Always up to no good.
ReplyDeleteThe picture of Basil Boddywicket and the bunny needs a NSFW label.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone!!
ReplyDeleteDani - GAH! I didn't remotely look at that gnome picture as being NSFW! Is it? LOL. I know there is an implication there... but the pic shows a fully-clothed gnome riding on the back of a bunny who's in full gallop mode. It's supposed to be like a gnome riding a horse, but it's a bunny. Again, I get that there's a bit of a cheeky implication, but I just thought it was a cute picture!!
Am I missing something? :O
ahhh, no worries. life isn't abt blogging. and totally get your fear of the overgrown garden. I do the same thing
ReplyDeleteNah, just playin' :)
ReplyDeleteI so covet your gnome! He and his bunny pal are gorgeous!
ReplyDelete