What sort of idiot dresses up a chicken?
That's an age-old question, right? Right?
Well it was late in the day and the boys were bored… and I had a left-over Santa outfit that came with a ceramic duck that broke years ago thanks to an incident involving the boys, the dog and a frightened cat on the run.
So one thing led to another and next thing I know we were in the yard with the chickens and the Santa outfit and...
...you know what came next.
And a big FYI if you ever want to do this.
1) You can put any sort of cape on a chicken and they don't seem to mind, especially if you throw down some oats for them to eat. With their affinity for capes, chickens obviously make good superheroes - or so say my boys who often tell stories of the three superhero chickens that live in their back yard. We have Kung Fu Chicken (Maggie), The Bionic Hen (Clementine) and Captain Chookiepants (Sookie).
2) Never ever try to put a Santa hat on a chicken. They really do seem to mind. Really. You can see it discarded behind Maggie in this photo. Part of it is missing. Don't ask.
3) Don't show the pictures to your husband. He'll never look at you the same again.
4) Make sure the neighbors aren't watching you do this. They'll have the same reaction as your husband.
...Because although it seems like it might be a fun thing to do, you really just end up being that crazy chick who dressed up a chicken. And for what it's worth, the chickens don't do much posing to even make the photos worthwhile.
They do a lot of walking away from you pecking at the ground.
They also do a lot of charging the camera to get the oats that are in your other hand.
And even if you Photoshop all the chickens together it doesn't turn out that well.
So probably my best advice is that only a true fool dresses up a chicken in a Santa outfit so maybe you shouldn't do it after all. And I'm well aware that my phone will begin ringing as soon as I hit the "Publish Post" button from my real life friends and family members who are probably organizing a chicken intervention at this very minute.